Monáe's Musings | Fabulous and Fortunate Podcast

I love my life story. The good. The bad. The ugly. The extraordinary.

There’s beauty in the journey. Sometimes in my darkest moments and when others have mistreated me I’ve asked God “Why me?” But when I think about it why not me? Why not me? Taking time to connect with my spirit has allowed me to see everything I have gone through as a testament to the beauty and extraordinariness of it all. Looking back, each time things got tough I was always reminded of the support that is available to me. I’ve learned that sometimes abundance comes in the form of receiving help and not feeling like I can do it all by myself. Being given tools to succeed. In the moments of my faith being tested the most I have uncovered new layers of self-love that I did not even know was possible. I have always come out better than before and even more in love with myself.

Along the rumbles and tumbles that were made to be apart of my life story, these moments that almost melted me catalyzed my feet to continue to walk onwards. I used to be ashamed of vulnerability. I saw weakness in asking for help and in showing emotions that I thought I shouldn’t have. Which created the notion in my head that the world wouldn’t be there to support me when I needed it. I have since found beauty in vulnerability and genuinely lean on my support system.

Each emotion has such a special place. From anger to love to joy, emotions were given for us to be able to work though our dealings with ourselves, as well as others. Nowadays, I embrace every emotion with open arms and gently say “I love you” to my body as I talk to God. I ask for help when I need it and I allow myself to be embraced by those around me. To not ever lose faith in humanity is my prayer. To never lose faith in the goodness of the world and the goodness that is revealed to me. To never lose faith in myself is my deepest prayer.

Many times my declarations of self-love were cried out in the midst of my darkest moments. Yes, I am going through this but I still love myself! Yes, I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing right now but I still love myself! Yes, this was really, really hard but I still love myself! Yes, I am taking a leap of faith and trusting not what I see but what I believe my life’s purpose to be – but I still love myself! Yes, this is heavy, but I still love and believe in myself! Yes! Yes! Yes!

Those moments used to seem ugly to me. But I now view them as extraordinary because of the deep connection I felt to myself and how these moments revealed abundance. How so immersed I was in love.

Yes, if I have that love, trust, and belief in myself and take that leap, surely I will either land on solid ground or be given wings to fly in any arduous or new situation. Believing in this and carrying this belief with me has been one of the biggest forms of encouragement I have been given. Looking back at some make or break moments I’ve had, I realize that they have always made me. Threatening to break me, but alas my being is held together and mended by a glue of my determination, faith, love, ambition, and the will to want to see what the end is going to be. This is not to say that we should glorify these moments of life testing us, but rather we should take note of them and see how they provide us with opportunities to build deeper love and trust in ourselves.

So yes, I love the good, the bad, the ugly, and the extraordinary. How can I deny any of my own life story? My own parts that made me into the woman I am today? And I would not have it any other way. I do not run from trials, I instead embrace them and allow it to catalyze deeper love for my whole self. For my body that provides sacred physical support for me. For my mind that has processed and sat with my emotions. And for my soul that continues to evolve and bloom into a magnificent extension of the Divine.